Wedding

Before the Wedding

When we fall in love certain endorphins are released and the feeling is so wonderful that we want to see more and more of the person. This is probably why we don’t mind things that would normally annoy us. But no matter how much two people love each other, sooner or later reality sets in. Often when you get married and have to live with this person.

The Little Things

Do you like the house quiet on Saturday afternoons or do you like the television on? Do you like to have the kitchen clean within a half-hour of finishing dinner or do you not mind letting the dishes sit there all evening? What is your definition of “clean” or “tidy?” How does your partner feel about that? Issues that seem small can quickly turn into big ones. Talk about these issues honestly and don’t just say what you think your partner wants to hear. We are talking about a lifetime commitment.

Children

Do the two of you want children and, if so, how many? What would you do in the case of infertility issues? Do you agree about the form of birth control you will use? And, if you resolve all of that, how will you care for children of you have them? Is one person going to stop working for a while? How long? What kinds of rules will you set for your children? Does one of you feel strongly about raising children with a certain religion? When you are single Muslim Jewish, Buddhist, Christian men and women can coexist peacefully but raising children together is another story.

Sex

Chances are you two like having sex with each other. Rather than talk about it, you would probably prefer to just do it. Although it may seem hard to believe now, passion and desire change when a couple has been together for a long time. Have a discussion (with your clothes on) about what you will do if and when that happens to you.

Money

Money is the number cause of arguments – even when couples have lots of it. Get a clear idea of how you both feel about spending and saving and keep communicating about how you manage your finances. Marriage takes work and communication. No dating site or anyone else can do that for you.

We’d all like to believe that love is enough but to make marriage work requires effort. Even the best marriages have their share of disagreements and difficult times. A good marriage, however, has many benefits and is worth the effort. Maybe that is the reason people continue to get married and try their best to and to stay married. Remember that when you both say “I do,” your journey is just beginning. Bon voyage!